what if they're right?
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Kenya is now the 51st state, yet the rest of the states have no voting power.
What if the Tea Party and their crazy theories are true?
Apparently, I'm a month late on my healthcare bill. My brother didn't pay his, he's been whisked away to prison. Serving 20 years. They warn me if I don't pay up I'll end up like him. I'm not allowed to see him in prison because I refuse to "Heil Obama!" to the guards to gain entrance to the facility. That, and I don't bow down before Allah, the new State Religion. The United States of Arabica.
He, King Obama, the Great. He's turned it everything into a wasteland. The innovative people are kept in cages, forced to come up with great ideas but given nothing in return except for food pellets that come out of a dispenser. The now White House Mosque (formerly just the White House) is no longer open to tours unless you're Muslim or gay. Or the now popular hyprid Guslim faith.
Kenya is now the 51st state, yet the rest of the states have no voting power, being that, according to King Obama they are just states and Kenya was recently a country thus outnumbering all state power. He of course is now King of Kenya, and thus America. We have elections but they're always rigged. You can only vote for "Obama" or for Obama with Enthusiasm." It's rare to hear back from those that check the first option on the ballot, so we all vote for him with fearful enthusiasm. Some have the audacity to write in another name, but those people are executed publicly and broadcast live on the only two remaining channels, PBS and CSPAN. At least I do have to admit they have become more interesting channels to watch than they used to be.
Sweets have been outlawed, and vegetable mush is required. It's a disgusting Green puree, kind of like Odwalla Superfood but with mind-controlling drugs. Michelle Obama has made sure that no one, anywhere can have a single cookie or morsel of happiness in what was once a land of plenty. This week is special because China is stopping in to see how things are progressing as work extra fast to meet a deadline for "China Rich Super Girl Barbie." In terms of grammar, or logic, the title of that toy makes no sense, but not a soul would dare criticize it. The Chinese are the only ones these days King Obama even seems to bow down to. The United States Toy Corporation. All companies, are United States owned and operated, and look, smell, and feel like the DMV. Roads are paved, schools are great, but only foreigners and poor lazy people have access to them. Only those that don't pose a threat to "The Great Spreading of Wealth" as King Obama puts it. Those that have babies out of wedlock are awarded wondrous homes and opportunities, vacations, and indentured servants. Married Couples, especially straight couples are assigned factory jobs, and tedious infrastructure projects. They are frequently looked down upon as being so backwards for loving traditional marriage. Gays are given better jobs for "moving forward" as Obama puts it. Many will fake gay marriages, just for the better work but if caught are punished severely in ways I can't even write in this article. The poor and the gays tend to have indentured servants, mostly made up of former Fox News employees, conservative bloggers, and those that opposed him prior to the Takeover of 2016. It feels like such a short time ago, I reminisce of the days where Bush and American Values were the rule of the land. A time where we could frolic free in the open fields of liberty. Go where we wanted to go, do what we wanted to do.
As I think of this I watch in horror as the officer finds Grandma. They take her away, a tear streams down my face and I wave goodbye. I'm too choked up to say anything. Why, oh God why did I ever vote Liberal?!??!
Okay I'm back to reality... Sad part is that I'm sure Rush Limbaugh, Glenn Beck, Sean Hannity, Michelle Bachmann and the the particularly brilliant Sarah Palin actually wake up at night with cold sweats and throbbing headaches worrying about that very scenario, or something very similar. Worse yet so do millions of Americans following these buffoons.
Matt Sky, Activism Editor: Matt Sky is a journalist, commentator, tech expert, comedic personality and performance artist. He has interviewed some of the most influential newsmakers in the world such as former President Jimmy Carter, Arianna Huffington, Russell Simmons and Larry King. He has appeared as a commentator on HuffPo Live, Sirius XM and has been a guest on a number of radio programs and podcasts. Matt’s areas of expertise include technology, public policy, foreign policy and philanthropy. Matt Sky can be... (more...)